Maddenation
Survey Says!
I recently received a Republican Party census document that I was one of “a select group… chosen to take part in the CENSUS OF THE REPUBLICAN PARTY.” Of course they really want money, but I decided to fill out the questionnaire anyway. Here are some of the questions (the choice of answers being yes, no, or undecided):
Do you support President Bush’s initiatives to promote the safety and security of all Americans?
Do you support the use of air strikes against any country that offers safe harbor or aid to individuals of organizations committed to further attacks on America?
Do you support President Bush’s pro-growth policies to create more jobs and improve the economy?
Should small businesses be encouraged to grow and hire more workers?
Do you support President Bush’s plan to make our schools more accountable to parents and to restore local control of education?
Should students, teachers, principals and administrators be held to higher standards?
Do you agree that teaching our children to read and increasing literacy rates should be a national priority?
Do you support President Bush’s efforts to save social security?
Do you support President Bush’s initiative to allow private religious and charitable groups to do more to help those in need?
Do you support the law, passed by the Republican Congress and signed by President Bush, that bans partial-birth abortion?
Do you think US troops should have to serve under UN commanders?
The last question was an invitation to join the RNC and make a contribution. The possible answers were:
Yes, and here’s my money;
Yes, but I can only afford $11 to cover the cost of tabulating my survey; or
No, I favor electing liberal Democrats over the next 10 years. (no kidding)
I plan to write them a letter thanking them for the opportunity to help develop a “BLUEPRINT for the Republican Party for the next 10 years.” I also plan to tell them that, as an engineer, I know how to read blueprints, and ask them if they need any help. Finally, although they didn’t ask, I plan to stress that I also am in favor of motherhood, and enjoy apple pie immensely.
Dad • Observations • 10/02/04 • 2 comments
Comments
Patrick • 10/02/04 • 8:12 PM:“Should small businesses be encouraged to grow and hire more workers?”
Yes, of course! If they’re going to grow them, they better hire them, otherwise they’ll just be increasing unemployment! When will we have responsible genetic farming?
Dan • 10/02/04 • 9:09 PM:Geez. You think that’s spin, I need to show you the stuff I’m doing for for the Democrats. I’m designing political mailers. My company handles the design for a Democratic political strategy group. Most of the crap they make us put in these mailers are the worst of the worst. Say a Republican doesn’t vote to decrease the cost of prescription drugs. These people will write a tag line, “Blah Buchanan voted AGAINST a bill that would allow our own citizens to live! We can’t afford to have this type of man in office!” I’d love to post these No Questions Asked campaign mail PDFs, but I’m pretty sure that’s not allowed. Eh, maybe I will.
Oh, and I didn’t know that I was getting myself into this.
Regarding the Bush survey, well, I think it’s farcical and anybody who can’t see completely through it doesn’t deserve to live or eat apple pie. It makes you wonder if politicians do anything all day or just think of ways to make you think they’re doing something.
Personally, I like crumb-topped apple pie. Mmm!
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