Maddenation
Birth Order Blues
My Netscape homepage today greeted me with the news that I got it good. Two articles, one focusing on first-born children, the other focusing on middle-born children, say that it’s better to be first-born. First-born children are more intelligent, get more education, and have higher-paying jobs. Middle-born children have a lower chance of going to private school and suffer financially compared to their siblings. Why? Because they never have the experience of being an only child and getting all their parents’ attention (and money) focused on them. And older siblings learn from teaching younger siblings, more than the younger siblings learn from the same experience. I know that I’ve had plenty of blessings from being the first child, but I am very glad that we seem to be bucking this trend in that everybody is doing well for themselves, and nobody is a criminal, like the UMass President’s younger brother is. I’m surprised there is no mention of gender in these studies, and no mention that older children in divorced families get more time with both parents. It seems like those issues would also contribute to the disparities. Discuss:
Patrick • News • 04/09/05 • 4 comments
Comments
Dad • 04/09/05 • 7:10 PM:Just to kick off the discussion, you’d think that maybe first-borns wouldn’t do as well because they have the most inexperienced parents who may still be acting more like singles. On the other hand, young parents have more energy, more idealism, are less likely to be workaholics, and have had fewer disillusioning arguments.
David, maybe you should chime in with genetic effects. Are “young ova/sperm” better? (I know, as a middle child with great talent and goodness, you may not want to bolster the first-born myth.)
In my opinion, gender has got to matter. My guess would be that it’s worse to be the second child if the first child is the same sex.
In closing, I just want to say that we are all precious in God’s eyes, and that I love all of my children exactly the same.
Patrick • 04/10/05 • 1:58 AM:Dad, I believe you that you love us all the same, but I don’t think the studies are talking about that. Consider: 1) there are more pictures of me growing up than of the other kids (though there are more pictures of the other kids’ sporting events than of mine); 2) I got the most complete financial support for college (though my contagious interest in volleyball helped pay for two other siblings’ educations, partway); 3) in your family, you do seem to be the smartest, and two of your younger siblings have struggled, one continuously; 4) back to our family: I do have more years of education than any of my siblings; 5) even though we’re all smart, I did better in school, on standardized tests, etc.; 6) David, our middler of the two middle children, was involved in every single childhood fight in our house; 7) concerning older siblings teaching/influencing younger ones, Dan now has a degree and works in the field I convinced him into, which I also like to do as a hobby; 8) I don’t think we’re the typical family for these kinds of studies anyway (we’re not even Norwegian!); I think we’re one of the luckiest families around, or the most blessed.
Honestly, growing up, I always worried that one of us kids would end up making bad decisions and flushing his/her life down the toilet. It seemed statistically doomed to happen. But we’re all in pretty excellent shape (not that we haven’t made some mistakes). The classic example is you, Dad, having boneheadedly quit college, just to fall victim to the draft, you turned it around by meeting Mom. Way to go, Dad! And Mom!
David • 04/10/05 • 2:48 PM:Yes, let’s talk about how I am the ONLY child who paid for part of his college education. That’s very fair. I paid THOUSANDS of dollars, and you all paid nothing. It’s no wonder why I was involved in all the fights growing up - it’s a conspiracy!! I haven’t read the studies yet, but I assume they do mention that the middle child is forced to do dishes most often.
Some of the stuff has only to do with age. I was the perfect age to be fighting with everyone (for instance, not too many 9-year-apart-siblings get into fist fights, or knife-fights for that matter). As for degrees, I had an advanced degree at the earliest age. And perhaps Dan will have a PhD by the same age Pat did.
I will check on the genetics of it all. Because it’s obvious that nuture can’t fully explain my awesomeness.
In closing, who wants to fight?
Dad • 04/10/05 • 11:55 PM:Patrick, of course there are more pictures of you growing up; it took you so much longer. By the way, I wasn’t disputing the first child syndrome, I was merely offering some food for thought. And who are you calling a bonehead? Makes me want to challenge you to a head fight!
By the way, it’s not too late to pay us back for your college education.
Dan, don’t expect me to pay for that PhD.
David, as the third child, you were in the classic “fighter” position. Kathleen was in the “conniver” position. I’m not sure what the 4th child is, but I think Dan did that pretty well.
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